Friends will let you down. Some will hurt you.
It’s a fact of life.
What matters is how you respond when it happens.
Last summer my family moved back to Texas after an eight year stint in California. A few months after the move, one of my friends in CA stopped responding to emails and unfriended me on Facebook.
Kaley and I met when our first born children were babies, in one of those moms groups for sleep deprived women in need of adult conversation. And support. And the comfort of knowing they’re not in it alone.
Our kids went to preschool together for four years. Had play dates. Joined little league. I hosted a party for Kaley at my house. We celebrated birthdays together. Shared life’s challenges over glasses of wine. Called each other in a pinch.
Seeing her always brightened my day. Made the grind more bearable. We weren’t just acquaintances. We were friends.
Until I moved away.
Yesterday I received an explanation.
It wasn’t anything personal. I reduced my friend list and kept the people I communicate with on a regular basis. You know how challenging the California crew can be. Hard to find the good ones. You were someone who moved and the chances of us keeping in contact are slim. Hope you understand.
I do understand.
I valued the friendship more than she did.
It’s not worth it for her to invest in the friendship anymore. I’m no longer useful.
At least she was honest about it. Not mean or caddy. Just matter of fact. I appreciated her candor.
I wish she’d sent a photo of herself giving me the middle finger instead.
Still, it hurts. For several reasons.
How you respond. And what you learn.
How about you? Have you been hurt by a friend recently? What did you learn from it? I’d love to hear in the comments.