How do you let go of someone in your life after a break-up? I don’t feel like I have anyone I can talk to about this! What do I even begin to do? It’s not healthy NOR is it beneficial. I have to figure out how to let this relationship go… even if that means losing the friendship. How do I let go of the past and embrace the present? –G
Yesterday I shared a question right from the pages of my own journal. I know several women who are experiencing this kind of heartache right now, so I wanted to devote some time to the topic. Whether or not you have experienced the ache that comes with a break-up, I know that we have all experienced the hurt that comes when any relationship changes. Coming to the realization that relationships are seasonal can be one of the most painful and freeing experiences of this life.
My friend Jon was quick to comment on the post in the early hours of Monday morning. His wisdom for healing after heartache was pointed and encouraging. Here’s what he shared:
Get grouped. Find community.
Get to giving. Don't focus inwardly.
Get to God. Dive into the Word.
Grieve. Let the process happen. Let. Get out of the way. Don't force it, don't avoid it.
Good stuff, right? Each of those areas of growth are so important when we are struggling to let go. And yet, in the depths of our pain and tears they might seem too… well, too easy for such deep heartache. But don’t disregard them just because of the alliteration. There is truth to each of those points.
GET TO GOD. DIVE INTO THE WORD.
In my most recent heartache, studying God’s Word was what got me through each moment of the day. I was literally reading scripture in between each and every work assignment. I explored the prayers and praise of King David by reading through the Psalms. I found that he expressed so many of the emotions and fears that I was feeling.
I committed Psalm 33:18-22 to memory… covering my computer, hands, and even car dashboard with this hope:
“But the eyes of the LORD are on those who fear him, on those whose hope is in his unfailing love, to deliver them from death and keep them alive in famine. We wait in hope for the LORD; he is our help and our shield. In him our hearts rejoice, for we trust in his holy name. May your unfailing love rest upon us, O LORD, even as we put our hope in you.” Psalm 33:18-20
TURNING A CORNER
My heartache turned a corner right around the time I reached Psalm 33. I discovered that God was speaking in my mess and pulling me closer toward Him.
Perhaps you find yourself feeling loss at this time. Friendships have dwindled, dating relationships haven’t gone as you expected. Will you trust Him to see you through this famine? He has the power to sustain us even when it feels like the world has turned upside down.
May I encourage you to place your name in the passage? Try something like this:
“But the eyes of the LORD are on Ginger who fears him, on Ginger whose hope is in his unfailing love, to deliverher from death and keep her alive in famine. She waits in hope for the LORD; he is her help and her shield. In him her heart rejoices, for she trusts in his holy name. May your unfailing love rest upon me, O LORD, even as I put my hope in you.” Psalm 33:18-20
As much as I want to control who enters and exits my inner circle of friendships and relationships, I just can’t. I’m so thankful for a God who has placed unexpected personalities in my path to shape and mold me. I’m even more thankful for the rejection (yes, thankful for rejection) that has forced me to cling to my Father and trust His timing and provision. When you feel at a loss, open up God’s Word and speak truth out loud to your crushed spirit.
“The LORD is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit.” Psalm 34:18
Praying for a Psalm 33 moment in all our lives this week…
This post was originally published at www.gingerciminello.com.