an extroverted fast {or sortof Lent} and the fear to speak

I have to consider it a gift the way God made me: extroverted-ness desires to draw people out. But some days like today, I have a hard time remembering why God made me this way {since I am surrounded by many introverted friends}.

Easter is coming and I haven't thought much of Lent, but I have fasted and prayed more in the last month than I have in a long time. Some days I just want to clamp a hand over my mouth.

In many ways, growing up an extrovert I have become a little introverted too. But there have been times I wanted to be so introverted, that I could not speak at all. I've prayed: "God, seal my lips shut like Zacharias (John the Baptist's dad)!"  Or, "Why can't I be like Ezekiel (4:8) where I am restrained so I can not move?'

Thank God we are not left orphans and without hope. It's by His Spirit I am able to listen when to speak and when not to. Today is one of those days I need to remember that.  And it's by His power I can heed those a good many times, although it may not be all the time.


Recently I was sharing with an {introverted} friend when she said "there is sin in many words." I was struck with that fear {of most extroverts} in keeping the tongue in check from sin. It's a noble thing that the book of James talks about in taming the tongue.

Yet, one of the greatest fears of an extroverted Christian is that we'll either be judged by others for our "many" words, or that we will actually sin with our words?

I am reminded we can not all be the same and that this is a good thing! I need introverts just as much as others need extroverts.

Easter {or Resurrection Day} approaches and I have felt crucified over, many times recently. I am to the point that when I have to speak or share, my appetite literally flies out the window. That is how sick I am of my "many" words.


Fasting has been more from my own desperation.

Anymore, the need to share or speak is like driving nails through my fleshy, pink skin {even if it is just among friends}. Yet, I've come to know some things are just too good to be silent on, namely Jesus.

Perhaps, it's an oxymoron for an extrovert to dread sharing.

It is only because I know myself well enough to know, Jesus must speak through me for my words to amount too much. I do not take them lightly or flippantly. His Spirit must give me utterance to say what only He can say. And in Him there are no 'troverts, just us abiding in His kingdom and bringing it here on earth, with or without words.



{If you are an introvert, you will love {as much as I do} what Emily wrote here.}